– tony.espino –

a human. for now.

Flies

TONY ESPINO FLIES V1.1 ORIGINAL DRAFT 7/7/15

INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT

OTTO and ALICE are sitting across from each other at a fancy
restaurant. Alice is grabbing flies out of the air and eating
them.

OTTO
Why you eating all the flies?

ALICE
Don’t start judging me again, Otto.

Alice snatches a fly off the wall and eats it.

OTTO
Dammit, Alice. It’s just that I
wanted to take you somewhere nice
where maybe you don’t eat flies.

ALICE
It’s not going to spoil my dinner.
Don’t worry.

She smashes a fly on the table and eats it.

OTTO
Should have never introduced you to
frog baseball.

ALICE
Somehow swinging a bat at
defenseless frogs makes me want to
eat like them. Can’t tell you why.

OTTO
People are starting to look at us
so just dial it back a little.

ALICE
(sarcastic)
Oh are people looking at us, Otto?
(to diners)
That’s right I’m eating items that
aren’t on the menu. Don’t look at
me like at.

She picks up a menu and smashes a fly with it.

ALICE (CONT’D)
(to diners)
Now it’s on the menu. You happy.

She eats the fly.

OTTO
Unbelievable.

ALICE
Don’t you judge me.

OTTO
Just ignore the flies. The same way
you ignore dining etiquette in
modern civilization.

ALICE
Whatever that’s supposed to mean.

OTTO
Oh great. There’s a fly in my soup.
Now I have to do the whole waiter
there’s a fly in–

Alice jumps on the table and shoves her head in his bowl.

OTTO (CONT’D)
No! Down!

He pushes her back in her seat.

OTTO (CONT’D)
What’s the matter with–

Alice jumps back on the table and shoves her head in his
bowl. She rolls on her back and pours it in her mouth.

OTTO (CONT’D)
That’s it! I’m going out to the car
to get my bat. I’m going to treat
you like the frog you are.

ALICE
Don’t you judge me!

BLACKOUT.

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This entry was posted on July 20, 2015 by in comedy, funny, humor, writers, writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , .

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