a human. for now.
I don’t have a reason to cry, and I have every reason to smile.
Beyonce suffers from dry eye syndrome and it’s her birthday. Happy birthday, girrrl!
And I don’t have a reason to lie, when you’re already reading my mind.
She just opened a card from someone claiming to be her clone.
And I don’t have a reason to be, if I can’t be with you.
Her clone proposes that they melt themselves together with marshmallows or a similar sticky object in the toaster oven. The motive behind this is to become one with Beyonce. One person. One Beyonce. Many marshmallows.
And I don’t need air in my lungs, if I can’t sing your song.
Beyonce’s clone is an air optional model and right now she’s opting for air. She plans on getting that air one way or another from Beyonce, and when she does she’s going to sing about it.
No I don’t need hands, if I don’t get to keep you warm.
In far too many words Beyonce is saying, “You think toaster ovens are hot? Check out this hand.” She then opens an old tin box. An aroma of severed, wet cat tails leaps from the box. Inside the box is a former Beyonce hand wrapped loosely in a Big Mac wrapper. There’s old lettuce stuck between the ring finger and pinky. Beyonce’s been looking for that. She tells her clone, “This is the hand I used to give the middle finger to the rest of Destiny’s Child at the end of our Destiny Fulfilled…and Lovin It tour.”
And I don’t really need myself, if I don’t need you.
Beyonce begins to realize that saying no to her clone is saying no to herself. She thinks, How far deep into this rabbit hole have I gone? Did I pack enough boob glitter for this journey?
Cause darling I wake up just to sleep with you
The clone is doing shifty eyes at Beyonce that say, “I have a crippling fear of being urinated on by a tree frog, also I’m pregnant.”
I open my eyes so I can see with you
Beyonce knows the baby will own dry eyes of its own at birth so she says, “Fine. I’ll be your eyes, clone baby.” The clone laughs knowing she has Beyonce where she wants her. Beyonce thinks this laughter is out of place at her birthday party so she frantically searches for a tree frog. She finds two and ties them together. She tells her clone to look at some sky writing behind her that really wasn’t there and then throws the frogs at her.
and I live so I can die with you
In her mind she’s saying, I’m Beyonce-Z. I live to kill my clones and their babies. Out loud she says, “Oh my god let’s have a baby shower!”